80+ Warren Buffett Quotes: Funny, Witty, and Sarcastic

Humor and wit are powerful tools that can transform the mundane into something memorable. A good laugh has the ability to lighten even the heaviest of days, offering fresh perspectives on daily struggles and common experiences.

Warren Buffett, renowned for his sharp mind and shrewd business sense, also has a remarkable sense of humor. His witty remarks and clever quips have not only made him a beloved figure in the world of finance but also a source of joy for millions.

In this post, we’ve gathered 80+ funny, witty, and sarcastic Warren Buffett quotes that will have you laughing, thinking, and maybe even rethinking your own approach to life and business.

On Money and Business

1. “The stock market is filled with individuals who know the price of everything, but the value of nothing.”
2. “Only buy something that you’d be perfectly happy to hold if the market shut down for 10 years.”
3. “It’s better to buy a wonderful company at a fair price than a fair company at a wonderful price.”
4. “Price is what you pay. Value is what you get.”
5. “Risk comes from not knowing what you’re doing.”
6. “If you don’t find a way to make money while you sleep, you will work until you die.”
7. “Time is the friend of the wonderful company, the enemy of the mediocre.”
8. “The best thing I did was to choose the right heroes.”
9. “The stock market is a device for transferring money from the impatient to the patient.”
10. “Wealth is the transfer of money from the impatient to the patient.”

On Life and Happiness

1. “I measure success by how many people love me.”
2. “The more you learn, the more you earn.”
3. “Happiness is a very high standard, but it’s something that I strive for.”
4. “The best way to predict your future is to create it.”
5. “You only have to do a very few things right in your life so long as you don’t do too many things wrong.”
6. “If you are not willing to own a stock for 10 years, do not even think about owning it for 10 minutes.”
7. “Live your life as though you’ll die tomorrow. Learn as though you’ll live forever.”
8. “We enjoy the process far more than the proceeds.”
9. “The most important thing to do if you find yourself in a hole is to stop digging.”
10. “The difference between successful people and really successful people is that really successful people say no to almost everything.”

On Success and Failure

1. “Success is never final; failure is never fatal. It’s courage that counts.”
2. “In the business world, the rearview mirror is always clearer than the windshield.”
3. “You only find out who is swimming naked when the tide goes out.”
4. “It’s not whether you’re right or wrong that’s important, but how much money you make when you’re right and how much you lose when you’re wrong.”
5. “I always knew I was going to be rich. I don’t think I ever doubted it for a minute.”
6. “The chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken.”
7. “The most important quality for an investor is temperament, not intellect.”
8. “I’m a better investor because I’m a businessman, and I’m a better businessman because I’m an investor.”
9. “The first rule is not to lose. The second rule is not to forget the first rule.”
10. “There’s no easy way to success, except by learning from your failures.”

On Investing and Stocks

1. “You don’t have to be a genius, you just have to be a good enough manager.”
2. “The stock market is a giant distraction to the business of investing.”
3. “The most important quality for an investor is temperament, not intellect.”
4. “Only when the tide goes out do you discover who’s been swimming naked.”
5. “If a business does well, the stock eventually follows.”
6. “Our favorite holding period is forever.”
7. “I don’t look to jump over 7-foot bars; I look around for 1-foot bars that I can step over.”
8. “I would rather buy a wonderful company at a fair price than a fair company at a wonderful price.”
9. “Price is what you pay; value is what you get.”
10. “The most important thing to do if you find yourself in a hole is to stop digging.”

On Business Philosophy

1. “I don’t invest in things I don’t understand.”
2. “It takes 20 years to build a reputation and five minutes to ruin it.”
3. “When we own portions of outstanding businesses with outstanding managements, our favorite holding period is forever.”
4. “The best thing we did was to choose the right heroes.”
5. “I’m not a guru. I just happen to be a good investor.”
6. “We simply attempt to be fearful when others are greedy and to be greedy only when others are fearful.”
7. “Business is like a roller coaster; the trick is to hang on until the end.”
8. “If you aren’t willing to own a stock for 10 years, don’t even think about owning it for 10 minutes.”
9. “There’s a lot of business to be done by people who just happen to be good at it.”
10. “Our approach is not one of ‘chasing the market.’ We just take advantage of what we see.”

On Money and Wealth

1. “Money is not everything. But it’s a lot more comfortable than poverty.”
2. “The lack of money is the root of all evil.”
3. “I don’t need a lot of money, but I like to make sure I have enough.”
4. “The rich invest in time, the poor invest in money.”
5. “It’s good to be the king, but it’s better to be the king’s friend.”
6. “You don’t need to be a genius to make money, but you do need to be smart about it.”
7. “The best way to make money is to help other people make money.”
8. “The more you earn, the more you need to save.”
9. “Money is like manure; you have to spread it around or it smells.”
10. “A penny saved is a penny earned – unless you’re in the stock market!”

On Leadership and Management

1. “The best thing I did was to choose the right heroes.”
2. “You can’t go wrong when you invest in people who are better than you.”
3. “Leadership is about helping others find their voice, not making them follow yours.”
4. “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, but they’ll never forget how you made them feel.”
5. “It’s good to have a lot of smart people around you, but it’s better to have a lot of smart, ethical people around you.”
6. “The most important investment you can make is in yourself.”
7. “Good leaders should have great vision, but also be grounded in reality.”
8. “Success in business is all about taking advantage of opportunities.”
9. “The right person in the right job makes all the difference.”
10. “You don’t need to be a great leader to be successful, but it helps.”

On Sarcastic Wisdom

1. “I am a lover of truth – it is just that the truth is not always very interesting.”
2. “I have seen more people fail from a lack of enthusiasm than from a lack of ability.”
3. “The market is the best place to go to learn that you are wrong.”
4. “Never ask a barber if you need a haircut.”
5. “I never met a man I didn’t like… except for those I’ve met who are bad at business.”
6. “Some people get rich by making smart decisions; others get rich by making very stupid decisions and then convincing you to follow them.”
7. “You can’t predict the future, but you can certainly prepare for it.”
8. “The first rule of investing is to keep your mouth shut.”
9. “If you don’t find a way to make money while you sleep, you’ll have to work until you die.”
10. “Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not out to get you.”

Conclusion

Warren Buffett’s quotes provide not only financial wisdom but also a unique sense of humor that makes us reflect on life, business, and even our own behavior.

Whether you’re looking to gain insights into investing or simply need a good laugh, these quotes offer a delightful mix of wit, sarcasm, and truth. Which of these quotes made you laugh the most?

Share your favorites in the comments, or let us know your own funny quotes! Don’t forget to share this post with friends who could use a little humor and insight in their day!